One of the things that I am proud to discover about being happy (that I have been mentioning in this blog) is to never compare yourself to others.
I have seen a lot of people being unhappy simply because they are envious of others who seem to do well in life. I have seen how their faces change color when they discover that one of the people they know have acquired a top of the line phone, high-end car, brand new house or has been promoted or simply has changed his/her fb status into “in a relationship”.
It is not only other people. I have also seen my close friends break down of bitterness when they found out that others were given a lot of good things in life.
Just this week, I found out that there are other employees who are getting higher compensation than they are supposed to get considering the work responsibility they have. I know that it is wrong to talk about salaries at work. But you can’t expect people to comply when it comes to money.
After finding this out, most of my co-workers were furious. I fully understand where they are coming from. I understand that among all employees, they are one of the people who deserve a raise. But due to some circumstances that we are not aware of, they seem to not get whatever is due to them. Thus, they have become bitter towards those employees and to the higher ups who are responsible for this.
There is nothing wrong for asking something that you think you deserve. But comparing yourself to other people because you are not getting the same or more than them, is something that will do you no good. It will only stir an endless cycle of disappointments and bitterness that will slowly eat up whatever remaining happy hormones we have.
I know the feeling. I was once an insecure bitch who incessantly compares whatever achievements or success I have with my friends. It did me no good. Instead of being happy for the successes of my friends or for the positive changes taking place in their life, I became sad. I have faked my smiles to them and I even lied that I am happy. I was the worse. I did not feel good about it. So I decided to stop.
I stopped comparing myself to my friends who earn more than what I earned. I stopped comparing my career to them. I stopped being bitter about not getting the same romantic happiness that others are getting. I just simply cut every insecurity and envy I was feeling. I decided to not give a crap about everything.
Instead, I started to acknowledge the things that I have. I tried to find ways on how I will turn my weakness into my own advantage or at least make the situation positive. I decided to focus more on the things that I really want.
Upon doing this, I realized that it was easier doing this, than thinking of things that are invisible in my life.
Because of this, I became satisfied and happy. I even realized that there is really no point to compare myself to other people.
Yes, others may have all the good things in life. But that doesn’t mean that you won’t have it. It is just a matter of working hard to achieve what you want. If I want to have the same life that they are having, I should also exert the same effort or hard work that they have exerted or even more.
I know it’s hard not to compare yourself with others. Comparing is our way of looking at ourselves as to how we have done so far. But humans are never satisfied. The more we compare what we don’t have, the more we put ourselves in that pit of unhappiness.
Being happy is to be satisfied. This may be a cliché, but clichés are true.
It may be hard to be satisfied in this materialistic world but being happy is our only key to be free and happy.
So if ever you feel unhappy when you see someone having their time of their life, think of something you can do to experience that.
Stop sulking. Do something. Life is short to be wasted worrying and comparing.
Have you cried of bitterness because you don’t have what others have? Or have you smiled because you are very much contented with what you have achieved?