This could probably the longest and ridiculous title that I can come up with so far. And I don’t need to elaborate what will be the content of this blog. Yeah, I am currently bored with my life. My cyclical-monotonous-and-stagnant-life-as-a-normal-employee-whose-life-is-supposed-to-be-exciting-considering-that-I-am-at-my-prime sucks.
When all my friends are busy with their careers or travelling around the world or smooching with their significant other in the streets, I am alone in our humble home thinking of how to waste my time aside from staring blankly at our dilapidated ceiling. Good thing, after weeks of being bored, I manage to do some work with the hope of a changed in routine in my mundane lame life.
1. I went with my friends for a photo shoot. Since I don’t have anything good to do on a Saturday morning, I decided to join my friend and my former professor for a fashion photo shoot. During the shoot, I realized that the only role I have in the team is to be the noble personal assistant of the model and the photographer. It was fun in a way. But since there is nothing much for me to do, I end up watching the shoot and do some “behind the scene” shots. In the end, even though I have not exerted much effort compared with that of my companions, I ended up very exhausted. So when I went home, I was knocked out to sleep.
2. I wasted my whole day thinking of reasons why I can’t go to a Religious Seminar. When I was in college, I enjoyed being a part of a religious organization. So when I graduated I had hoped that I could join another one. Years passed and the thrill and interest in joining a religious group faded in me. So when I was invited recently by one of my friends to this Christian seminar I found myself alone in the middle of the crowded room. The topics are good and very interesting. However, it was not interesting enough for me to keep my focus on the talk.
I simply felt that I don’t belong there. So when the next weekend session starts, my dilemma was how to explain to those people and to my friend that I don’t have the will to attend.
In the end, I did not attend the part two of the seminar and told the organizers that I was feeling lonely and tired (which is true, btw). They were kind enough to tolerate my excuse and I was bad enough to turn them down again for the next sessions.
3. I had my hair dyed. My messy and unmanageable hair has given me so much to stress about that I always end up putting it in a bun just to keep it intact. With my patience gone, I gather all my savings and went to a parlor to have it fix. I don’t know where did I get the courage to go for a striking color but I did ask the hairdresser to have the most obvious color for my hair.
Never in my life have I imagined that I will dye my hair with a weird color given my fetish for black. But then again when you don’t have patience anymore to tolerate something that seems to stress you out, the only way to go about it is to go against it. Though, I’m still surprised to see a different person in the mirror.
4. I started reading historical romances… again. I told myself that I will not read historical romances again because first, I find them lame. Second, they make (single) girls hopeless romantic. And third, they are very addicting. But since I am not feeling myself, I decided to indulge.
I am not at all proud to say that I enjoy reading historical romances and that I am a fan of Johanna Lindsay. But since I am not feeling good and utterly super bored – screw that.
5. I keep a to-do list to turn into a things-I-did-not-do list. Laziness has its way with all of us.
I am not sure if I am undergoing my quarter life crisis moment or I’m just dramatically bored with my life, which I think is the latter. But whatever it is, I think it sucks. YOLO? Yeah… yeah…Whatevs!